There is no scientific formula to determine when, how and why someone chooses to enter recovery. However, it seems the desire to live and thrive at least helped Sarah Maria to choose life.
Entering the Maze
Suite101: How did you go from wanting to commit suicide into recovery?
Sarah Maria: For me, it was a long process with many twists and turns. Yoga was the first and most important component in helping me to stabilize. Yoga helped me to calm down to the point that I could start going to therapy and begin to unwind some of the destructive patterns that were controlling my life. I first began therapy nine years after my first “diet.” With the help of therapy I was able to function fully and effectively, yet I still struggled with fear about gaining weight and hatred of my body if I was not rail thin. This fear stayed with me for many, many years. True and lasting recovery, to the point that I was able to appreciate and honor my body and have a peaceful relationship with food, took about 15 years.
The Secrecy, Shame and Pain of an Eating Disorder
Suite101: Was anyone besides yourself aware of the mental and emotional anguish you were grappling with?
Sarah Maria: I lived away from home, so I kept my struggle and my suffering secret from almost everyone. There was so much pain, embarrassment, and shame associated with it that I didn’t want anyone to know. If no one knows, it is very difficult to help.
Securing the Help of Family and Friends to Beat an Eating Disorder
Suite101: How were family and friends helpful or not helpful in the process, and, what would you like to say to family and friends who might be trying to cope with someone they love who has an eating disorder or NBO (negative body obsession)?
Sarah Maria: My family was as helpful as they could be. Unfortunately, they did not know that much about my struggle. My family didn’t get involved because they didn’t realize the extent of my pain and suffering. They had no idea. When they later learned about it, they were as helpful as possible. Yet they were not trained therapists, doctors, or healers, so there was a limit to what they themselves could offer. They did, however, completely support my getting professional help, and this was the most important thing.
If family and friends know about the struggle, it is a blessing. The best thing you can do is to help them find quality professional help. Provide all the love and support that you can, but, if at all possible, get as much professional help as is available. As I said, it took me nine years to get professional help. It might have alleviated a lot of pain and suffering if I was able to get the help sooner rather than later.
No one need suffer from eating disorders. The web is loaded with excellent information. However, choose information that promotes recovery.
Finally, if trauma has been a component within one's life, self-help could cause more problems than it would solve. If trauma issues exist, please seek professional, licensed help. Again, please, if any information within this article raises concerns, seek help from a licensed therapist trained in treating eating disorders.
Jeannie Delahunt - Welcome! My Prelude I have many passions--problem, not enough time to indulge in all of them. Because I am mainly interested in ...
